Special Delivery
by AntiSora
Summary: Emil decides pizza sounds good for dinner, and orders some for himself and his twin brother, Ratatosk. Ratatosk insists on adding some special instructions for the delivery, and Emil finds them to be completely embarrassing.


**A/N**: I actually just had a blast writing this, I really hope you people enjoy it at least half as much as I enjoyed writing it! It was inspired by a post on Tumblr. ( post/76108108833/staciastarburst-direhuman-kenfucky)

**Disclaimer**: I don't own the character presented here, they are the property of Bandai-Namco and I make no money from this story.

* * *

It was a Tuesday night, and Emil was feeling rather lazy. He was hungry, but didn't really want to bother actually cooking anything and he knew his twin brother, Ratatosk, would be feeling the same. It was a bit later at night, too, and really he just didn't feel like going out. So, that left a few options. He could eat something that didn't really require much effort, like cereal. But then Ratatosk would demand he make him a bowl, too, because that's just what Ratatosk did. Or, they could order something for delivery.

"H-hey, Ratatosk? D'you wanna get a pizza?"

The blond in question pushed himself back on the couch so he could bend his neck back over the armrest to look upside down at Emil. "I'm not going to get it."

Emil shook his head. "I-I meant to have it delivered..."

That, however, sounded just fine to his brother. The smile that appeared on his face, however, definitely made Emil uneasy—it never ended well. Ratatosk rolled over and off the couch, grabbing his laptop from the small table beside it and powering it on as he plopped down in a chair next to Emil in the small kitchen area.

"How about that place with the hot delivery guy?"

"Y-you say that about EVERY delivery guy!"

"Not the one that was like a fucking whale!"

"That's mean! He wasn't that big, and just because he's a little bigger doesn't mean he's unhealthy..."

"Whatever. Anyway, how about that local place, with that stupid delivery ass?"

Emil had to think about that for a second, wondering why Ratatosk didn't just mention the name of wherever, but finally he thought he figured it out and couldn't help but laugh. "You mean the 'Chosen Delivery Boy' one? With the red hair and you thought he was a girl?"

Ratatosk glared at his twin, red eyes narrowing dangerously. "It's not my fault he's so pretty!"

"Hey! Guys can be plenty pretty! I-I mean... That o-other one... Works..." Emil trailed off, his face a brilliant shade of red, and he looked to the side. Really, though, it was quite true—Emil did find the other redheaded delivery guy to be quite attractive.

Ratatosk, however, cracked up, finding his brother's behavior rather amusing. "You are _totally_ crushing on that one with the glasses! Hey, I've got an idea! You should totally put 'send the cutest one' in the special instructions box!"

"WHAT?! NO!" Emil looked horrified at the very idea, there was no way he'd do something embarrassing like that! Absolutely not!

Ratatosk, however, just shrugged as he pulled up their simple website and logged in to their account—the pair were regular customers, after all. He put in their usual order, then grinned and glanced at Emil. "You sure you don't wanna? I mean, cuz then I'll just tell 'em to send whoever has the biggest dick!"

"DO WHAT YOU WANT!" Emil buried his face in his arms, unable to even believe his brother right now. Really, Ratatosk was just a big pervert.

"Fine, I will~" Ratatosk said with a sort of sing-song quality to his tone. "But hey, the account _is_ under your name, so, you know—" He never got a chance to finish before the laptop was snatched out of his hands by an Emil who's face was, if memory served correctly, now right around the exact shade of red as the hair of the delivery guy Ratatosk was pretty sure his brother was crushing on.

"FINE I'LL DO IT!" Emil squeaked loudly, knowing full well that Ratatosk was the stronger of the pair of them and that if he _didn't_ put some kind of message along those lines in that his twin would simply overpower him and take the laptop back. And probably write something even lewder than what he'd just suggested!

The embarrassed and slightly scared blond scooted away from his brother once he had the laptop in his lap, tensing up when it didn't work and he found his twin standing behind him and watching him input their usual order over his shoulder.

"Don't forget the 'special instructions'!"

Emil cringed but slowly typed "please send your cutest delivery guy" into the box, and finished submitting the order. He wanted to melt into the chair, and he let out a small whine at his brother's next words.

"You are _so_ opening the door when he gets here!"

* * *

Richter Abend was not a people person. He found them often tiresome and generally annoying with their petty squabbles. Accordingly, he was idly leaning against the wall, watching Zelos and Sheena argue over who should be sent home.

It was a slow night, and they had far more delivery people scheduled than the business they were doing actually called for. Zelos was arguing that Richter should be sent home, on the grounds of "we only need one beautiful, brooding redhead around here!" and Sheena was arguing that Zelos should leave on the grounds of "yeah, the one who isn't a pervert!"

"Oh ho! So, my voluptuous beauty finally admits that she finds me gorgeous!" Zelos grinned, and pumped a fist triumphantly into the air, only to cry out in pain a second later as Sheena's palm connected soundly with his face.

"I SAID NO SUCH THING, YOU ASS!"

Richter couldn't quite contain his amusement, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he watched their other two co-workers—a clumsy but incredibly friendly girl named Colette and a not-exactly-bright-but-not-stupid-either boy named Lloyd—trying to step in and calm the pair. Really, though it was always like that between them. Richter was just about to get involved himself, since Sheena looked like she might be reaching for something to throw at Zelos and they really didn't need another incident like that, when a small beep alerted them to an order.

Sheena was the first one over to the computer, reading off the order aloud. "Okay, it's for a medium sausage and pepperoni pizza with extra cheese, and a small pepperonis pizza with extra cheese, sauce, and meat. ...And..." Here she paused, stifling a laugh, and smiling.

Colette looked over her shoulder, wondering what it could be. "...'Send the cutest delivery guy...'? Why would they ask something like that?"

Richter had approached, but almost backed off hearing that. If they wanted to pull that kind of crap they could deal with Zelos. He did, however, glance at the screen just as Zelos was cheering because he was clearly the only choice to send.

"Emil?" He frowned a little, that name being familiar to him. He finally placed a face to it—that cute shy blond with the strangely fascinating green eyes and the bit of hair that stuck up like an antenna, and that had a rude, loud twin brother—when Sheena spoke up.

"Somebody you know?"

Richter shook his head. "He's a regular. That one with the psycho twin who broke a guy's jaw last summer for insulting him."

Zelos stopped dead in his tracks. "Oh shit, that guy?! Hey, Lloyd, I bet you'd pass as cute to a dude, you wanna take this one?"

Sheena had a different idea, grinning like a cat with a cornered mouse. "Oh no, he specifically asked for the _cutest_, and you never let anybody forget that's you!"

Richter, however, didn't particularly like the idea of Zelos going. Nor Lloyd. He'd delivered to the pair before, and had seen them come in. Not hard, considering they ordered something at least once every other week—if not every week—for the last year or so. Truth be told, the little blond fascinated him, so he stepped forwards. "_I'll_ deliver the damn pizzas. Just get them ready."

He didn't wait for any comment, just walking off to resume his previous position leaning against the wall.

* * *

Emil was more than a little nervous about this. He couldn't help but wonder what he'd do in a situation where his and the delivery guy's roles reversed, though he had an odd feeling that he almost knew how he'd react.

Ratatosk interrupted his contemplation of the situation as he backed off from the window, grinning, and handed Emil some cash. "He's heeeere~"

"Y-you wanted to put that! Y-you answer the door!" Emil's protests, however, did nothing to stop Ratatosk from walking around behind him and pushing him towards the door. "R-Ratatosk! N-no!"

"Oh, you have to answer it. I refuse to." Honestly, he just wanted to see how Emil reacted and he hoped whoever it was would give Emil a hard time. If it was that stupid flirt one, he hoped it would be as awkward as possible.

Emil nearly chocked when the doorbell rang, but managed to take a few deep breaths to gather what little shreds of his self-control remained and he opened the door instead of trying to flee. He knew Ratatosk wouldn't let him. He peeked out and squeaked a little, realizing that it was the same one he'd caught glancing in his direction a few times when they'd seen him in the store waiting for the pizzas to send out.

Emil managed to open the door, but heard a little grunt of surprise behind him.

"Oh goddess they _actually_ sent the hot one!"

The poor blond's face turned just about the same shade of red as the hair of the man standing outside the door, and he made a choking sound. He turned, his voice halfway between a squeak and a whisper as he scolded his brother. "_Ratatosk! Don't say that kind of thing!"_

He turned back to the other, only to find an odd smile on his lips.

Richter, for his part, was actually more than a little amused. He honestly had to admit that blond was very sweet and shy. And, to be honest, cute. _Especially_ when he was blushing like that.

Richter handed over the pizza and waited for Emil to fumble with the change, raising an eyebrow at the sizeable tip the blond was counting out—most likely as an apology for the events of the night. Still, when Emil reached out to hand it to him, Richter pulled a hand out of his pocket and took the money, replacing it with a little slip of paper.

When the green eyes of the other looked up at him, confusion all over his face, he just gave him a little smile in return before turning and heading back to his car. He turned back, glancing towards Emil, and called over his shoulder, "I don't work Thursdays."

Emil, however, was baffled by this comment, and slowly closed the door. Ratatosk had bounded up to him, wondering what was in his hand, and Emil opened the piece of paper. He stared in confusion at the numbers written on it, until Ratatosk's shocked voice sounded over his shoulder.

"He actually gave you his fucking number?!"

And with that, Emil felt his legs give out from under him and his vision went black.

* * *

Richter grinned to himself as he glanced at his phone, noting that it was an unfamiliar number. He opened the text, and was actually surprised to find it contained a picture of Emil lying on the floor, the piece of paper with his number next to him.

'_The idiot passed out, asshole.'_

And yet, Richter couldn't help but smile as he texted back, _'Just have him text me when he wakes up.'_

It wasn't until he was heading in to work the next morning that he got a response, from a different number this time, but all it said was "Coffee? 2 Thursday?"

He pointedly refused to answer any questions about the extra bounce in his step that day. He also refused to comment on the odd visit from Emil during the day Friday wherein the blond handed him a small container of cookies, muttering something about his "stupid brother pouring coffee on him".


End file.
